More Than Ever
by cybergothXD
Summary: Even when Jean has returned...that doesn't stop the tension between her and Logan..tension that is getting too much for both of them
1. Forbidden Heaven

Logan lay awake again, he hadn't been able to properly sleep since he met Jean again, after coming back from the lake. She was even more beautiful than he remembered…her face came easily to his mind as he lay curled up in his bed, listening to the sounds of Scott and Jean come through the walls. He shut his eyes tightly but tears still trickled out of the corners of his eyes. Why could nothing ever go the right way? Why did she love Scott? Did she? Did she feel anything at all for Logan? All those questions and more ran through Logan's mind as he tried to shut out the sounds that his extra sensitive ears were picking up.

Suddenly there was a knock at his door and a slim frame appeared in the door frame. Logan caught his breath as he saw Jean enter his room in her nightwear. He fought to control himself and find his voice at the same time.

"Jean…er…hi"

"Logan, I could feel your grief from my bedroom…I know it's me…I feel terrible, but is there anything at all that I can do to help without hurting Scott?"

Logan's voice croaked out " There is nothing…unless…you would….kiss me…just this once…please…"

Jean felt so sorry for him that she couldn't resist. She felt attracted to the man anyway, which was unforgivable, so this couldn't make things any worse. It was only a kiss…what harm could it do?

"Ok Logan…just a kiss, nothing more"

She slowly leaned up from where she was sitting next to Logan until her lips met his. They both felt a surge of emotion that they had both never felt before. It was like heaven…forbidden heaven, as they both knew they shouldn't be doing this. Logan pressed his lips hungrily against hers and she felt her lips opening so that she could taste his mouth. They had both never felt anything like this. Logan pulled her closer until she was straddling his lap. They were gasping and kissing alternately, both of them breathless. He pulled her closer, running his hands across her body, and she was reaching down his stomach, not getting enough of him. It was only when she paused slightly that they came to their senses.

"Hey Jean, I can't do this … and neither can you" Logan said brokenly.

Jean nodded and sighed as she slid off his lap and stood up.

"Logan, I cannot deny what I feel for you but I belong to Scott and I'm sorry but I have to be with him. I love you Logan, as you love me, but it cannot be." She said determinedly. Then Jean headed to the door. She turned back and whispered "I'm so sorry…" and closed the door.

Logan clenched his fists and beat the pillow. Why?...when he was so close? This had just made him want her more than ever…love her more than ever…


	2. Reflections

More Than Ever – chap 2

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the x-men characters…sighs…if only…

She had left him wanting more…even more than he did before she came to his room. Logan was haunted by that kiss now…Jean forever in his thoughts and imagination. He couldn't just let her go like that, it was impossible for him, he couldn't resist flirting with her purely because oh his small hope that she may leave Scott and come back to where she belonged. Logan thought that it was just wishful thinking though, apart from that night…that night which he will remember forever…for everything that it was yet could have been.

Logan couldn't cope with this…he was so near to Jean, yet so far, his restraint grew less until a night came when he went to comfort Jean by the pond.

_Jean_

She belonged with Scott…he loved her, she was supposed to love him. Had to love him. He was always there for her, he was good-looking, kind…loving…all that a girl should want. But when she met Logan that turned upside down, she fell in love with him. A rush of fierce emotions flooded her body whenever she saw him, she was always thinking about him…and this was made even worse by the fact that she couldn't be with him…she just couldn't. It wasn't right.

Jean sighed, and sank down next to the pond in the gardens of the mansion. For a minute or so she trailed a slender finger back and forth in the cool water before her sadness and loneliness overcame her. Wretched sobs took over her body, shuddering through her as salty tears dropped into the pond, disturbing the water with her sadness. She closed her eyes tightly, trying to stop the endless flood of tears. She couldn't stop loving Logan…even thinking of his name made another round of tears leaked down her face.

She curled up in a ball, her face resting on her pale arms, willing the pain and hurt to end.

_Logan_

Logan couldn't sleep…thoughts of Jean raced through his mind like wildfire, he could not get rid of them, they were always there. He thought he would go mad soon, he could never have her…she might say that she loves him, but when she's with Scott she seems to forget he even exists. Logan growled in his throat, venting his pain and anger. He strolled to the window and rested his head against the glass gently. He couldn't get over her…what was is about this woman? He could answer that himself, she was beautiful, in every way possible, he loved her mind, soul, body, heart, whatever, he loved everything in her. He had never been affected so deeply by a woman before, in the past it had always been lust and that was it. But what he felt for Jean was so much deeper than that, so deep it was part of him now.

He glanced out of the window, the sun was setting over the hills and casting a dusky light to the grounds. The pond was reflecting the light, it was entrancing. His gaze strayed to the side of the pond. Jean was there. His heart suddenly started beating furiously, just because he had seen her. She was curled up, on the side of the pond, she didn't look very happy. Instantly Logan ran out of the room and down the stairs, he could not bear to see her in pain, it hurt his soul to see her like that.

R&R Please! Some people wanted to see this continued so I decided to, I'll try and get chapter three up as soon as possible, maths coursework at the moment though  thanks for the reviews:D


	3. The Ultimate Decision

More Than Ever – chap 3

_Jean_

Her eyes were sore and swollen…her tears had finally dried up, but her unhappiness hadn't disappeared, she had sat like that for a long time and it hadn't changed anything. She wondered whether she would be happier with Logan…spending her life with him, sharing his bed, his love…his love. He had shown it to her before…but she couldn't have it…no matter how much she longed for it, it was forbidden. Fresh tears began to pool in her eyes as she thought these thoughts, it wasn't doing any good. She just felt so empty without him, as though, without him there was nothing, Scott didn't matter to her anymore. She buried her face in her arms again and sighed deeply.

Suddenly she felt a strong warmth behind her, and comforting arms curve around her body and hug her tightly. The man hugged her close to his chest as she smiled faintly and leant against his chest. She could tell who it was instantly, and straight away felt better. It was Logan…he loved her, and she loved him. At that moment that was all there was to it. She let herself curl against his chest and shut her eyes, enjoying his embrace.

_Logan_

Jean relaxed against him instantly. He felt so much for this woman, and he was certain she felt the same. So what was the matter with her? He let out a feral growl from the bottom of his throat, she should be his, he had to comfort her, it was instinctive. He loved her so much. He lowered his head and gently pressed his lips against hers. Their kiss grew more passionate as Jean lifted her hand and curved it around his neck, bringing him closer to her. Their kiss was full of desire and wanting, they couldn't get enough of each other. But then Logan realised that Jean had tears still pouring down her face. He broke his mouth away from hers and whispered to her gently, his breath warm on her face.

_Jean_

She felt him stop kissing her, and felt reluctant to break away, but she knew that they needed to talk. He must be so concerned, she thought.

"Logan…why did you come down here?"

"I saw you…I had to Jean, you have no idea how much I feel for you right now, I can't stand to see you suffer." He said, surprising Jean slightly by his words.

"Want me to tell you what's wrong? I belong to Scott, I can't leave him, it would be wrong, he loves me so much. But Logan…I love you, not him. And I can't go on like this, I want to be with you Logan, but Scott…Scott is always going to be there, I can't leave him, but I can't stop loving you. I curse the day I met you Logan, you turned my life upside down." She whispered, her voice breaking slightly.

"Jean it doesn't have to be like this, I could go away, never come back, you could stay with Scott." Logan said, even though it was clear he would hate to do that. Jean wouldn't even consider that. She placed her fingers on his lips and spoke to him.

"Hey, I don't want you to do that, it would be even worse, times like this would never happen, times when I am close to you. You understand me more than anyone else, I want to be with you Logan."

"What about just seeing each other in private? No one else would have to know Jean, it would be secret, Scott wouldn't know. Because I can't live like this anymore, these precious moments make me love you even more, if that's possible. How about that? Please Jean, come on. Please." Logan begged, his eyes unreadable as his gaze bore into Jean's.

Jean sighed. What could she do? If she passed down this opportunity to be with Logan her heart told her that she would never have this again. This would be her only chance. Yet she knew that Scott would hate her forever if he found out. If she saw Logan in private, her life would be riddled with secrecy and guilt. Is that what she wanted? If she was with Logan, could she cope with that?

Jean made up her mind, and turned to speak to Logan, she kissed him softly on the mouth before continuing. She prayed that she wouldn't regret this decision later…she knew she would, but she could always hope. She opened her mouth and whispered in Logan's ear.

R&R please! Thanks so much for the comments and reviews, I really appreciate it! xxx


	4. Bitter Sweet

More Than Ever – chap 4

_Logan_

He caught his breath as she whispered in his ear. He knew what he wanted to hear, he wanted her to desert Scott and be with him, but he also was aware that it was much harder than that.

"Logan…I have found that I can't be without you at the moment…it is too hard for me, so even if I don't want to hurt Scott it seems to me as though I have no other choice. I love you Logan…so so much." She spoke softly yet urgently, looking desperately at him, with such love and desire that Logan wanted to lead her away there and then.

_Jean_

She knew it was true, she wouldn't last much longer if she wasn't with Logan, it was impossible for her. She loved him more than she should, and she had just betrayed Scott completely.

"Oh Scott…" She murmured brokenly before tears came streaming down her face again. She had to face the ultimate dilemma. But even through this sadness she had Logan comforting her and being there for her. She was so grateful for that. She kissed him urgently, letting her mouth betray her need for him. He responded in the same way, before tugging her to her feet and leading her into the woods, as far from the mansion as possible. She was crying as they made love…crying from happiness and sadness, happiness for Logan, sadness for Scott…but it would be ok, she knew that, if they kept things secret, then hopefully it would all be ok…false hope she knew, but it was something. But right now, all she could do was snuggle into Logan's sleeping body beside her and allow his warmth to comfort her. Love was so hard she thought…it's so similar to sadness…it hurts just as much. If not more.

There you go! THE END! Lol. Took me ages and I don't think its particularly good but at least I've finished it now. :D


End file.
